December 2011
6 posts
3 tags
The First Week of January: A Short Story
Newsflash: I quit FunnyCrave. It’s a long story. Everybody parted on good terms, except maybe for the one guy that I told to go fuck himself for being a lazy, unimaginative prick. That guy is probably not on good terms with me anymore.
To make up for it, me and my fellow FunnyCrave writers, David Dietle and Dan Seitz, have blazed our own path to comedy writing glory and it is called...
Top 3 Things I Can't Remember
1) Ah…ummm, you know…that-uhhhh, ehhhhhhhh, thing
2) And, uh,…[snaps fingers]…that other fucking…shit, man. What’s the goddamn second thing?
3) …
I am...THE PROCRASTINATOR!
I really hope I spelled procrastinator correctly. We have all sorts of wonderful computer technology, like crazy voice command tech that talks to you with a foreboding, ominous confidence in its own words, yet we haven’t been able to crack the code on getting spell check to work when capslock is on. I’m certain someone over in the secret society that creates computers thought it would...
2 tags
Dear Nature: Make The Giant Weta Not Exist...
This is the third of my three favorite articles this week. Of these favorites, this is my favorite among favorites.
Dear Nature: Make The Giant Weta Not Exist Anymore. Please.
2 tags
According To Science, WiFi Kills Sperm. To Put It...
This is 2 of 3 in my week of pretty good articles.
According To Science, WiFi Kills Sperm. To Put It Another Way, WiFi Is A Contraceptive
2 tags
As Americans Get Fatter, Our Ability To Care...
This was a good writing week. Today being Sunday, I’m going to link to the three best articles of the week, all of which are from Holy Taco. This one is 1 of 3.
As Americans Get Fatter, Our Ability To Care Lowers
