This is a thing I wrote. It’s about military MREs, or “Meal, Ready To Eat.” It’s the stuff our soldiers eat on the battlefield. But not while in battle. That would be really stupid of them. Besides, who would want to be shot at and be eating an atrocious omelet at the same time? That would be like being in Hell and putting in a request to take a peek over the fence to watch the super-fun volleyball tournament they’re having in Heaven — it would just make you feel that much worse about your situation.
Thank you, Soldiers! You, collectively and individually, have more balls then the rest of us. And seeing as I have no idea what it’s like to be shot at, I will say that by simply eating MREs every day you have proven that you are tougher than I will ever be. Now, if you will excuse me, I’m going to do some more whining and complaining about how the sandwich I just ordered came with a sour pickle and not the half-sour I was hoping for.
I’m such a pussy. It’s rather remarkable, really.
Here’s the link: